出柜——针对同性恋青少年
许多男同性恋和男同性恋青少年发现自己处境艰难;告诉还是不告诉。
决定对自己的同性恋身份保持沉默是痛苦的。最重要的是,你很难接受自己。另一方面,如果你决定告诉别人,就会有被支持和接受的问题,或者可能会被那些对你来说最重要的人拒绝。
当父母发现自己的孩子是同性恋时,常常会感到震惊。无论你是母亲还是父亲,无论你有儿子还是女儿,无论你是长期以来一直怀疑这类事情,还是完全惊讶地发现可以肯定的是可能会让人震惊。朋友之间也是如此。
在本节中
我加入了一个"出柜指南“帮你做决定。下面是其他人的故事。分享经验会很有帮助,也很有力量。阅读即将出柜的故事可以启发和发人深省。
出柜故事
是否出柜的决定可能是巨大的。阅读这些来自其他同性恋青少年的故事。希望你能从中得到一些启发。
史蒂夫:
16岁的时候,我告诉妈妈和姐姐我是同性恋。我来自宾夕法尼亚州的一个小城市,当时那里的偏见真的很可怕。我不知道还有谁是同性恋,我妈妈和姐姐听到这个消息后,在接下来的六个多月里都拒绝和我说话。他们会骂我,取笑我,试图让我相信我不是同性恋。直到18岁,我告诉了我的大多数亲戚朋友,我才意识到爱来自于完全的接受。然而,我从未后悔忠于自己。我生命中所有其他的成功都来自于我生命旅程中最艰难的决定。这是我最自豪的时刻。我去过世界各地:中国、日本、玻利维亚、墨西哥。我交了很好的朋友,有了很好的关系,有了非常丰富的生活(我21岁,现在住在中国北京)。 I know I would not be where I am today if I didn't take that courageous first step and start to fully love myself. I know the pain that comes from having to lie to those you love, the stress that comes from having to pretend to be someone you aren't. Those memories seem so so distant today, but seemed so insurmountable when I was a teenager. I am a great listener and would love to talk to you if you are dealing with gay related problems, if you're feeling sad, need advice, or want to hear how I've gotten to where I am today. I really want to give back to the gay community, to all of us who just want to be who we are, love, and be loved. I look forward to talking with you soon on MSN or through电子邮件.我希望你们能拥有和平与爱,因为你们能战胜黑暗,拥抱真理。真相会让我们自由。
Kacie
我叫凯西,今年15岁。这一切都始于我12岁的时候。我开始意识到我对女孩的吸引力,而不是我“应该”对男孩的吸引力,我疯狂地爱上了我最好的朋友特蕾西。过了一会儿,我去找我的姨妈,她也是同性恋,问她该怎么办。她让我别告诉特蕾西我可以把她吓跑。嗯,我听了她大约一年,但是夏天的时候我再也受不了了。我不能看着她的眼睛一直瞒着她。所以我把她叫到我家,我崩溃了,告诉她。起初她很震惊,但告诉我我们之间什么都不会发生。但她看起来很淡定。 But afterwards, we just kept drifting farther and farther apart. Finally, on my 13th birthday, she called me and told me she couldn't be my friend anymore. (that was my wonderful bday present from her) After that day, she stopped returning my phone calls and emails. It absolutely killed me to lose her like that and I turned to my best friend at the time to pick up the pieces. After about 2 months of becoming real close, we crossed the line from friendship to lovers. She became my first girlfriend. We dated for 3 months. She was my first for just about everything, but after 3 months of being together she called me and told me that she cheated on me with a guy. The guy was freaking 22 yrs old. He later went to jail and she also called to tell me that she was pregnant. She then had the nerve to ask me to stick around for the kid. I lost it. I was 13 years old and she was only 15. There was no way I was taking care of her kid and I told her to take a hike and wished her a good life but it tore me apart to do that. It took everything I had to let go of her. I was still in the closet to all of my family except my aunt and all of my friends so no one knew what I was going through and how much I was really hurting inside and I refused to let them see that. I just couldn't take the pain that I was feeling at the time, so I started to cut myself - but never enough to bleed and then one night I decided that this was it I was done with life. I had nothing to live for. I lost all of my friends when I lost my girlfriend. People were saying things behind my back, rumors were flying around the school about me because of my old friend Tracy and my ex-girlfriend. So I decided August 23, 2003 would be my last day here on this earth. I had it all planned out. I had the note written and everything, but that night I ended up seeing my hero, Terri Clark, in concert instead and that night she made me change my mind about killing myself. She showed me that night that it was okay to be me and that it didn't matter what other people said and she gave me the strength to carry on. Still, to this day, when I have a bad day, I turn to her music to pull me through. I am now completely out to my school and to my family. Some of my family doesn't like it, but I don't really care. I lost most of my friends that I did have but I have made new ones that have stood by me since the day we became friends. I am now in the process of fighting for a Gay Students Association all because one teacher reached out and showed me I wasn't alone and she gave me the strength to fight for what I believed in and she showed me that I could grow up and lead a happy life as a lesbian and she is one of my biggest role models. My gay friends in my school have been helping me to start the GSA but we are sure the fight has just begun and we know this will not be an easy fight to win. We live in a extremely homophobic town as I had to learn the hard way. I am now banned from seeing my best friend because I am gay and I am looked down upon by most parents in my town when I use to be the most loved kid by all parents -- all because I have become the spokesperson for the GSA. But I am happier than I have ever been even though I am picked on, looked down upon, and banned from seeing some of my friends. In my mind, I am at least being myself but being yourself always has some consequences.
安德鲁
大家好,我叫安德鲁,今年16岁,是一名同性恋。我是去年五月初出柜的。我鼓励那些还没有出柜的人这样做,尽管对一些人来说可能很难。其实没有什么好害怕的,除了家人或朋友的拒绝。尽管这种情况时有发生,但并不总是如此。我的家人和朋友仍然爱我,接受我。这就是我。出柜后我感到很轻松,我可以做我自己了。这种感觉太棒了。我也从这次经历中认识了很多新朋友。 Just remember that you're still their child and they'll love you no matter what. And they might not even be that surprised, being that mine weren't since they have always known...it was a little obvious. So be gay and proud! Don't let what people say or think about you effect how you feel about yourself. There is nothing wrong with it, it is who you are. Love knows no gender.
阿里
评论-对我来说,公开我的双性恋并不难,因为我很幸运,有开明的父母和很棒的朋友。但有时我不得不怀疑,他们真的在认真对待我吗?我注意到很多人认为当一个女孩说她是双性恋时,他们似乎认为她只是指性,或者不是真正的“同性恋”。我觉得这种说法大错特错。双性恋是同性恋的一种形式,双性恋者也受到同样的嘲笑。但这一点似乎没有被理解!我不是一个对和女人睡觉感兴趣的直女……我不是一个对和男人上床感兴趣的女同性恋……我是一个人,和其他人一样,我是双性恋,对我来说,这意味着我在一段关系中看不到性别,我看到的是一颗心。双性恋不是色情术语,它是全人类的爱。 It took me long enough to come to my conclusion, and all I want is for others to hear it.
APA的参考
Staff, H.(2007, 8月10日)。出柜-为同性恋青少年,健康之地。2023年4月2日,从//www.5wetown.com/gender/gay-is-ok/coming-out-for-gay-teenagers获取