看到精神疾病的故事在线骚扰你吗?

我读这篇文章有点晚,希望你和其他任何人看到它。需要告诉我们的故事,听到那些痛苦的沉默,没有真正的家人或朋友的支持。我失去了更多的朋友比任何人在过去的几年中已经隔离,避免那些存在,因为当我问,告知,并恳求人们只是他跟我来,如果有的话,是的,只是静静地坐在我旁边的引述说。我最需要的东西,但是它变得避免像我有瘟疫。我已经56岁了,离婚,一直生活在几乎完全隔绝了超过5年了。这很伤我的心。我疼。我哭了。我试着睡觉屁股尽可能通过天,天黑的时间……那时我觉得我是“安全”。没有人可以看到我希望,这不是不寻常的人在黑暗中。在床上 Even when it's 5:00 in the fall. My divorce was mean and cruel, and I was personally and publicly humiliated in a courtroom more times than I care to remember. But I can't forget. They're all emblazoned in my brain from the very beginning when I became my now narcissist ex husbands public and personal enemy #1. My divorce, prior to, during, and after, (when he drug me back to court), to get more "stuff", was what gave my my most recent diagnosis of complex ptsd. The traumas I was subjected to in the courtroom and out are unimaginable to the few people who know the story. To start with, (mid divorce proceedings), my ex went through 3 Attys. The first two dropping him for lying. The third gained him a new judge, and I was forced to represent myself after my own Atty had dropped me because it was dragging on too long. He knew I didn't have the money for all the fees racking up, yet my ex persisted. (It's what narcissists do). They must win at any/all cost. He won huge. The judge denied my request to postpone until I had legal counsel. I told her that my only income was disability for the major depressive disorder, and crippling anxiety, I was approved for in 2009. (This was 2013). Her reply to me was "You look fine, you walked in here totally unassisted and you'll represent yourself"! I was mortified. That was the beginning of the hellish 5 months that were before me in and out of court, several times, (needlessly). My ex made a circus out of it, but it was his circus and I was the joke. The gold digging wife who wanted things she didn't deserve, and I was beaten to a pulp on a witness stand by his Atty and the Judge forced to answer ridiculous questions of blown up insane lies that to this day I know someone had to help him with. I can't even speak here about the ultimate and most traumatizing thing that happened near the end of these crazy trials over THINGS. My state is a no fault state, and community property state, which means anything obtained during the marriage should be split 50/50. No fault meaning they did not care that I caught him cheating at which time he denied it and always did. We haven't spoke since the last courtdate 10/2013. I'll never speak to him if I don't have to. He's an abusive manipulative person who you can never win with.
通过所有这些我完全孤独。我的狗是我唯一的伴侣,原因我今天还在这里。我肯定如果没有她我会找到一条出路。我现在交货毒害我的唯一的孩子,一个成年的女儿从我高中第一次婚姻。她是我岩石和最好的朋友。我们是一个妈妈的女儿。她不是跟我5年,我也没有看到我的三个漂亮的孙女在5年。我很自豪我们的关系,几乎在一夜之间我恨我不确定原因。她从没问过,我从来没有得到发言的机会我的真理。我的母亲和我都不接近。 She's never been a mother in any sense of the word unless you ask her. She's also a very controlling person who's told me numerous times I've chosen depression over her and my family. I stopped contact with her at the urging of a counselor. A great counselor. My mother told me I was a disappointment, an embarrassment, a failure, and blamed me for the failure of my marriage. She knew nothing about why ,but said I couldn't keep a man. A man she disliked the first time she met him over 20 years ago. We lost our home to foreclosure that I had owned prior to meeting him. She blames me for that and asked why it wasn't paid off years before and what was I doing with my money earned from the jobs I'd always had. She never once asked me how I was. NOT ONE TIME. EVER. I felt I had no choice but to stop contact while also going through an unheard of insane divorce that I'm also blamed for dragging out as told by my ex to everyone he has gotten to listen. He moved with his girlfriend to within a mile of my daughter. My daughter believes she has a relationship with him that has nothing to do with me I was told. It has everything to do with me. Positive of that, too. Threatened me for years that if we ever split up he'd move as close as possible to make my life a living hell. He did that during the end of our marriage and continues to today. He's done it because he knows how weak I was with depression. He knew I'd felt suicidal at times. He's partially responsible for that. Very much responsibile in fact. He's in contempt of court since the month after our divorce was finalized. Refuses to pay the little but I was awarded monthly. I'm afraid of him. Have no money for legal fees and free legal aid is a joke. I will never step inside a room or courtroom with that man ever again without a very capable attorney,, & that's not likely to happen as I struggle daily just to keep my head above water financially. It's exhausting. I've lost everyone that I held close to me that believed in me
我女儿和3无辜的小孙女,他们热爱自己的奶奶,但有可能忘了我或者被告知上帝知道。
现在我的抑郁和焦虑是麻痹。
今天,这是一个美丽的星期五,进入另一个周末,我怕超过另一天。我跟有家庭和少数人完整的生活。他们计划与我最近似乎总是取消或我不听到他们像上周日。第一次永远,我期待和一个朋友出去。然后什么都没有。没有文本。没有电话。没有回电话后我打电话来确保一切都好。没有回复。什么都没有。 They know how loneliness is taking more of me each and every day, (if they've heard me at all). I'm broken hearted and devastated to this day over my daughter and granddaughters. It doesn't get easier. It doesn't get better. It never goes away. There's not a day or night I don't cry over it. Depression was a struggle since 2006, but this, this is so much more on top of that. It's been called Complicated Grief. Grieving fot someone who's still alive. That's exactly what I've been doing along with all the usual anxiety, (agoraphobia often), the symptoms of C-PTSD are triggered by so many everyday things that I'm always on edge and hyper vigilant. I'm afraid. I see a counselor but it's not enough. I take meds, but they can't fix this heart break. It's a bandaid is what it is.
我渴望有人说话,看到当我周围人们大多数时候,我很舒服,我有趣的风度翩翩,魅力甚至是惊人的,我被告知。我用这些东西,但这只是暂时的,不是经常记住女人我曾经相信我。前一个一个巨大的定义和转折点在我的生命中,我永远不会忘记,和其他一个,没有人比我自恋的前任配偶无疑对仍然微笑。
我希望我的生活。我希望我爱的家庭。我的母亲不是那么多。我试着跟她解释了十几年,抑郁症对她没有结果。你怎么开始谈论这一切最重要的是,这是颠倒了你的生活里面,知道的人应该关心你不? ?我不能失去我的女儿。除了我不能活的痛苦,因为我的辅导员说我需要尝试。他不相信说“放手”,谢天谢地,因为我永远不会放手。就在这里和我在一起的每一刻。
我很乐意听到别人。任何人。不为任何事情只是朋友。
我不是故意去这么长时间,我发誓,只是不断的痛苦,我想我需要听到,和验证。我是一个好人。关心和爱的人,不管别人可能认为。他们不知道我不再出现。我恐怕他们不会再试一次。
谢谢你读这的人。我知道那是如何漫长的道歉。我不知道如何缩短或说它比我有任何其他方式。
再次感谢你。我喜欢健康的地方。这里有一些对每个人来说都难以置信。

精神疾病是一种疾病,就像糖尿病。大脑中有一种化学失衡与精神疾病,就像有一个糖尿病糖和胰岛素分泌不平衡状况。精神疾病是一个医学问题。一个人会有人歧视患有糖尿病?为什么有些人thinbk好歧视的人是一个医学问题叫做精神疾病?

纯粹和简单的,“我的目标与他人分享我的故事是如此可以知道他们并不孤单。”- - - - - -- - - - - -this is a wonderful read. In a world where everyone seems to be putting everything on the internet and everyone is a critic it can be difficult to navigate the waters. This is a powerful, simple reminder that sometimes it's really not about us, (or those writing) rather, it's for other people. We are all in this together if we keep that perspective. Thanks for sharing.

同意劳拉和也写我们的经验我们可以帮助,无论小或大,应对耻辱和神话围绕心理健康。我担心很久的博客,为什么我写它,是谁为....但我得到的反馈是,它可以帮助人们了解更多关于抑郁症和在我工作的地方导致对话可能不会发生。但最好的我回来的是一个朋友读的一个帖子,然后寻求帮助……这是我从未想到的东西。这意味着我的一切。我的帖子“关于我!”试图解释我为什么写作周围的整个思维过程,从正面和负面的观点来看,我有时会觉得有压力。